Monday, July 27, 2009

Perfectionist

I have a perfectionist husband. Literally in every aspect of life. He is SO picky about food, about hotel, about clothes, and about women? haha! about EVERYTHING!

I am not a good cook. Before we were married I've never cooked any single proper meal (as far as I remember I could only cook steamed rice, instant noodle, and one failed stir fry veggies). But once I got married and moved to Incheon, I had no choice than cooking (preferably JAPANESE FOOD!!!) for three times a day. No maid, no mama.

Poor Hiro had to translate the Japanese cooking book every night after tired working. Simply because he doesn't trust any recipe on the net (especially the English ones) or from any other recipe books except those are published by "ORANGE PAGE". He believes that Orange page's cooking books give the best Japanese recipe. See? what a picky guy. Even for a cooking book!

I tried my best. Again, I am not a good cook so it takes long long time for me to cook single meal. Hiro always says' "why do you need 1.5 hours to cook? other japanese wives only need 40 minutes!"

I am still in the process of learning, and I thought that I've done my best and now a much much better cook than I was ever before. But like almost every night I still get complaints about the food I cook. I always have to say a lot of "I am sorry...." on our dining table instead of "really? thanks".

I know that he works hard everyday. From 6am to at least 8pm that he really expects to eat something really yummy at home. I DO my best every night to cook good food to my tired husband. But well, as I said before, at least I have to say once "I'm sorry" to him.

Don't get me wrong. I am open to all critics and complaints. Its just....sometimes I feel like crying. It's been four years. I don't know if I could ever cook a perfect food for my perfectionist husband......

7 comments:

The Diva said...

did you sometimes ask that you also need some little compliments here and there? I mean, you're not a Japanese wife... and you do have plus points elsewhere...

I@m sorry I can't help a lot. Especially because I don't cook either so I don't know why people have to be fussy and perfectionist when it comes to cooking....

LadyNoor said...

I think you should have a chat with him about this. Sheila is right, you're not a Japanese woman who was probably being prepared all her life to be able to cook perfect 3 course Japanese dishes in 40 minutes. I don't think it's healthy that you have to keep saying sorry like that, night after night. Gently remind him that you do try your best and if it's still not up to his cooking standard that he has to down his level of perfectionism to meet with yours... Maybe a little talk will make him realise that his criticism is a bit too much for you to bear lately... Good luck dear :)

Carla Chanliau said...

why did you have to say sorry for an imperfect meal? i mean it takes sometime for someone to learn to cook their own national food, leave alone a foreign one. because you need to know what a "good" meal tastes like so you can figure out what's missing in your meal. i've never cooked japanese food but it obviously has so many "foreign" ingredients that you need to get accustomed to. i mean hiro should realise that. why don't you talk about it openly one relaxed day?

anyway, dunno what's better with mine. vincent always says he likes my cooking that i've come to a point now wondering if i do cook well or he just compliments it because that's what i wanna hear. :P

Mbak'e said...

Aku juga dulu gak bisa masak, Moet. Di Indonesia mana pernah aku masak sendiri. Di Jepang aku biasa pakai sesuatu yang instant, dan masakan favoritku kare (tahu khan kare jepang yang pakai kare-ko instant - nyengir).

Kalau bikin masakan jepang seperti nimono ato nikujaga, aku suka pakai dashi-soyu (dashi yang udah komplit ada soyu sakenya), jadi kita gak bingung lagi sama takaran bumbunya. Dan biasanya rasanya udah pas dengan lidah jepang. Eh, tapi papanya Iki gak suka dengan yang instant ya??

vini said...

i dont mean to be rude here, im sure he is a lovely guy, and that is why you married him, but next time if he ever complains about your cook, ask him, have you ever complained about his salary? im sure you never did, since you know he has done his best. so, im sure he knows you have done your best as well :) as much as it will hurt him if you complain about his salary, it does hurt you too if he complains about your cook. i hope u understand what im trying to say.

and imoet, i just understood what u told me when we first knew each other, being a housewife, is the most difficult job i ever done. its about raising a human being, what a responsibility!!!! i hope one day my boy can say the same as yours, that i am his best mama :)

Anonymous said...
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jessicabold said...

I was perusing "perfectionist husband" and stumbled across your blog... I feel your pain and hopefully since this post it has improved...just wanted to let you know you aren't alone.

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