Tuesday, April 26, 2005

Where do I belong.....?

Lately I read several topics about multicultural issues, and Ella's last blog about how racial the Indonesian students in Berlin reminded me of my childhood and inspired me to write this.

I was born from a mixed couple. My dad is a Manadonese and my mom is a Banjarese. I may look like a chinese from my mom's blood: small eyes. But I have colored skin and I am a REAL Indonesian.

Due to my parents' business, I spent my childhood moving from one city to another. Jakarta - Banjarmasin - Manado - Banjarmasin - Surabaya. I was still TOO small to feel anything when I was in Jakarta, but in Banjarmasin I spent quite a time and experienced this so-called discrimination.

I graduated from a Catholic Junior High school where 90% of the students were Indonesian-Chinese students. There everybody addressed me: hiii native........Just because I didn't have as fair skin as theirs.

Then I entered public Senior High School where 90% of the students were Banjarese. I remember, from the whole students of the same year (5 classes of 45 students), there were only 5 non Muslims students. There.....they addressed me: Shierly...? oh...the chinese one....

Happened also in Surabaya. During my first 2 years in Uni, I took 2 different majors at 2 different universities. One was a Catholic uni, while the other was not. Again for some, I was Shierly the chinese girl; while for others I was Shierly the native.

Now that my working places are multicultural ones, I feel relieve not hearing that anymore. But once I get into the society........I will be AGAIN addressed both as "native" and "chinese" from different groups of people. Why can't society just leave this "native" or "chinese" nicknames? I'm sick of it. We are all Indonesian. We may come from different races, have different religions and speak different languages, but we are from the SAME country. I really understand how the children from a mixed cultural background feel. We don't know where do we belong?

Whole of my life, I have experienced lots of discrimination. That's why I HATE racial people sooooooo much.

4 comments:

Carla said...

hell yeah!!!
i wish someone read this. *cemberut*

but then again, i've developed a circuit theory why they do like differing people racially. there are surely lots and lots of background reasons and each person's reason may vary. but i'd like to think that they actually do that cause they feel insecured of themselves. they aren't capable to accept themselves as the way they are and to cover that, they try to find others' disadvantages, some of which are least likely to be ones.. and form this so-called assumption of "which race has a higher position in the society". *sigh*

annoying alright. but there's no need to listen to them.
but yeah.. if i had a dick, i'd fuck them all. :)) excuse my language.

Sheila said...

Hahaha... yeah, been there, done that! Hate all those racist people as well. So f***ing what if I was born chinese... I don't speak the language nor understand the culture. I am who I am. I love making frenz with no limitations.

And YOU, Imoet dear, belong to yourself and Indonesia. Homeland. The hell with all those color-differing people. If they were color blind, they wouldn't be able to do that anyway!

As the Germans say : "Ich träume von der Welt ohne Grenzen"
I dream of a world without borders. Nations, blood, skin colors, religions are all masks. We were born naked, we die naked too. What hell difference does it make? Screw them all.
*kok jadi ikutan Carla misuh2 sih... hihihi, gak boleh banyak2 gaul ama Carla*

Wacky Serenade said...

Hm, kalo menurut aku mungkin ini efek jangka panjangnya dari penjajahan belanda dulu, yang punya motto "devide et empera" jadi moyang kita terpisah2 berdasarkan etnis ato agama ato kelompok lainnya. Ditambah lagi di jamannya Orde Baru ama pemerintah orang2 etnis Cina semakin di "eksklusif" kan dan juga (meng "eksklusif" kan) diri mereka dalam kehidupan sehari2 kita.

I guess di setiap negara, masalah SARA selalu ada. Even di Afrika, yang warna kulit dan kepercayaan sama aja bisa ada perang suku. Apalagi di Indonesia, yang notabene campur aduk gado2 tipe orangnya hehehe...

Jadi mungkin salah satu cara untuk menghilangkan semua ini, ya dimulai dari kita sendiri, kalo bisa gak ngeliat orang dari faktor SARA nya. Aku belajar dari banyak pengalaman, mending punya beberapa teman yang berarti dan bisa mengerti kamu apa adanya, daripada punya banyak tapi ternyata mereka hanya melihat kulit luar aja. (aku kok ngalor ngidul ya? hehehe)

Anyway, laen kali kalo ada yg ngatain ras ato hal2 lainnya gak usah dikasarin, bilang ae ama mereka: "Tuhan ampunilah mereka yang udah berdosa ini" biar mereka cepet tobat hehehehe....

valens said...

Yah, itu semua karena ada perlakuan perbedaan kaum Minoritas dan Mayoritas yang enggak sehat dan turun temurun, kesalahan dilakukan oleh dua belah pihak yang saling menaruh 'dendam nenek moyang'. Dari TK Sampai lulus kuliah temenku malah 90% dari kaum minor juga ga ada masalah. Sebenernya perbedaan itu indah kok, contohnya Papiku yg punya face jawa tulen tapi punya cucu putih2 dan sipit-sipit hahaha